Yesterday morning started with my daughter, The Bride, busily preparing chocolate ganache for the afternoon’s truffle party. Some of her soon-to-be-extended-family had volunteered to come over to help make truffles as wedding favors.

Everything seemed under control.

My daughter went to take a shower. The mowers arrived to mow and blow the yard (we’re going to have wedding pix in the yard) so I quickly brought the dogs inside.

The phone rang.

Amidst the blur of the noise from the shower, the mowers, and my loquacious friend talking to me…I heard some rustling in the kitchen. An inner alarm went off and I ran into the kitchen, only to find the dogs–these incredibly valuable, beloved, idiotic dogs…EATING THE CHOCOLATE!!!!

Chocolate is toxic to dogs. Especially REALLY GOOD, HIGH QUALITY CHOCOLATE!!!!

I ran to get milk and poured it into their bowls…hoping it would coat their tummies. I did notice that it was organic milk from Whole Foods. Expensive organic milk. These dogs were having quite a day.

Still worried, I took them on a long walk, hoping they would throw up or have diarrhea (not in the backyard where the wedding pictures will be taking place!).

Nothing happened…other than the dogs seemed delighted to have an extra walk and I was even further behind schedule. And worried the dogs would be dying soon.

During the truffle party, the dogs were banished outside. I kept one eye on them, expecting them to have seizures or kidney failure or something horrible.

Nothing happened.

After the truffle party, still worried, I went outside with them. Tails wagging, they seemed unfazed by their exposure to a toxic element. Maybe a little bit hyper.

While outside I noticed that the mowers had broken a sprinkler. I told my husband, who was NOT AT ALL HAPPY ABOUT THAT. Steve had to stop everything and tear apart the grass because, of course, it wasn’t an easy fix. It broke off below the sprinkler head and into the pipe. Of course, he had every spare part to fix it but one so off he went, scowling, to Home Depot.

In the meantime, the dogs must have found Steve’s tools on the yard and decided they needed to be chewed a little.

I tried to explain to Steve that the dogs feel they were not getting the attention they thought they deserved and why did he leave tools out, anyway? He was not sympathetic to their plight.

Fortunately, the chocolate did not have any affect on the dogs at all, other than threaten to push me over the MOB edge.

Not a good dog day.