The vets called yesterday and I learned a little more about Azure. They think she had either a brain tumor, lesion, or aneurism that ruptured. Not knowing has been hard…it helps to know what the reason most likely was for her early death.
Grief is a funny thing…it’s right up under the surface and the smallest things can trigger a fresh wave.
On Saturday night, we were watching a movie to distract us from Azure’s very recent news. The first song on the movie track was, “Go tell Aunt Alice the big brown dog is dead.”
We turned it off.
On Sunday at lunch, my two daughters and I went to a sorority brunch. When we walked into the house, my college daughter’s best friend, Maria, ran up to us with sympathetic eyes (Maria is a dog person). That started us crying and we had to leave. We’re pretty sure sixty sorority girls think that my daughter, Meredith, has a very emotionally unstable family.
Later on Sunday, my oldest daughter, Lindsey, and I were in a Coach purse outlet. The sales woman came up to us and cheerfully asked, “Are you looking for a dog collar? This is a wonderful one.”
Lindsey and I looked at each other as if to say, “Are you KIDDING me? Do you not know we are deeply grieving for our pet RIGHT THIS VERY MINUTE?”
Politely, we told her no and left the store quickly.
It actually made us start to laugh.