Website of Author Suzanne Woods Fisher
Connect:
Saturday lunch, after the ACFW Bay Area Chapter meeting. I taught a writing class on “Creating Dialogue Driven Scenes.” Note Revell author Sarah Sundin is second on right!
Sunday’s talk, about the Amish, was given to the San Jose Presbytery Annual Gathering of Women. My display table! Lots to “schlep.”
A terrific group of interested, intelligent women.
Welcome to Author Spotlight! Each week will feature a different author. We’ll get the scoop behind their writing life and dish a little. The authors will also be giving away a copy of their latest book. FUN.
The winner from last week’s Author Spotlight with Beth Wiseman is Mary Levie! Please email my assistant Christen with your mailing address. (ckrumm@litfusegroup.com)
This week please welcome Donna Fletcher Crow in the spotlight! To win a copy her book An Unholy Communion (Lion Fiction, 2013) , leave a comment on this post.
Share a little bit about yourself. Married with kids? Empty nester? Do you work full-time and write when you can squeeze it in?
Hi Suzanne, thank you so much for inviting me to your Monday Author Spotlight!
A married empty nester. Stan and I will celebrate our 50th wedding anniversary next December. The trouble with being not just an empty nester, but a scattered nester is trying to gather our 4 children and 12 grand children back for a celebration since they live in Calgary, Boston, Kentucky and Los Angeles.
I work full-time—at my writing. I try to get to my desk about 10:00 every morning and stay until 3:00 when Stan (who also works from home) and I both break for afternoon tea.
And share something about your writing. What’s your genre(s), your areas of interest…
English Christian history is my passion, so all of my 43 books, even my Idaho pioneer family saga, has something to do with English history. My best-known work is GLASTONBURY, The Novel of Christian England, which covers 1500 years through Celtic, Roman, Arthurian, Anglo-Saxon, Norman and Tudor England.
How did you get started writing? Did you have a dream of being a published author?
I was an English teacher and avid reader. I fell in love with a minor character in a Georgette Heyer novel who demanded that I tell the rest of his story. BRANDLEY’S SEARCH, which became book three in my six-book Cambridge Chronicles, was the result.
After you started writing seriously, how long was it before you were published?
It seemed like forever at the time. Several years while I attended writers’ conferences, got to know the business and honed my skills. I finally got a contract for the book, but the publisher was slow to bring it out. Then I was sitting with Carole Streeter from Victor Books at a writer’s conference when I got the news that that publisher was going out of business.
“What do I do now?” I asked Carole.
“Send it to us,” she said.
“You don’t publish fiction,” was my reply (surely one of the world’s all-time hard sells).
“We’re just starting a new fiction line,” she said. That launched the Cambridge Collection series which was later reprinted by Crossway Books as The Cambridge Chronicles.
Aside from a cup of good, strong coffee, what helps you get all of your “brain cylinders” firing so you can write well? Do you have any favorite places and routines when you write? How many hours a day do you spend writing?
Make that a good strong cup of English Breakfast tea. It helps a great deal if I have an outline, or at least some scattered notes to remind me where the story is going. Notes and pictures from my research trips are absolutely essential for putting me in the scene. My goal is to write a minimum of 5 pages a day. The next morning, after Morning Prayers and the above-mentioned tea, I do a few stretching exercises while my computer boots, check my email, and begin work by rereading what I wrote the day before. Hopefully the story will flow from there for another 5 hours or so.
What has been the biggest help to you in the journey to publication? Writers’ conferences? Writing groups? Your mom as your first draft reader?
Writers’ conferences, definitely. The Mount Hermon Christian Writers’ Conference was my “home” for many years. After attending several times I was asked to teach and was twice given their “Writer of the Year” award.
Is the “writer’s life” what you thought it would be?
Since I rather fell into it I’m not sure what I expected, but I never could have imagined anything being so much fun. Of course the struggles are terrific but I’ve been in the business for more than 30 years and every day I thank God for the joy of being allowed to do this.
What are your biggest distractions?
Biggest distraction is my greatest joy—my grandchildren. When I was writing with children at home I thought it would be easier when they were out on their own. Not so. As I mentioned above we are scattered to the four corners of the continent and getting to visit them is a challenge. It was much easier when our children were home in their own beds—even when I was changing diapers.
What was one of the best moments in your career and what was one of the worst?
Two bests: First, the satisfaction of writing and the publication of my epic GLASTONBURY.
Then the worst, a ten-year hiatus from 2000 to 2010 when I had nothing published—which led to another best—the publication of A VERY PRIVATE GRAVE, first of my Monastery Murders which has led to an almost all-new career at the age when my more sensible friends are retiring. Life is definitely never dull!
What do you least like about being a writer? Most like?
I dislike feeling overwhelmed by the amount of writing and promoting I feel I should be doing. I love doing those things, but I dislike the feeling that I’m never done because there’s always so much more than could be done.
Research is one of my favorite parts of the process. Because one of my goals as a writer is to give my readers a “you are there” experience I try never to write about a place I haven’t visited first. That means a wonderful research trip for every book. You can see pictures from some of my more recent trips on my website.
What is the role and importance of an agent?
Ah, without Janet Benrey I certainly wouldn’t be here today. Janet, who is English, really understood my Monastery Murders series and sold them to an English Publisher Monarch Books. That restarted my career, as I recounted above. Now Janet and her husband Ron have their own publishing company, Greenbrier Books and they have published several of my books in ebook format, including GLASTONBURY, my Daughters of Courage pioneer saga and The Lord Danvers Victorian True-Crime series. A TINCTURE OF MURDER is my newest release with them.
What advice would you give to new writers?
Read, read, read! Read the classics and the very best in your favorite genre. Then write from your passion.
Pretend I’m a customer at a bookstore looking for a good book. Give me a one or two sentence promo to convince me to buy your book.
Would you like to take a trip to Wales? AN UNHOLY COMMUNION takes you across the idyllic landscape of mystical Wales with history, mystery and romance to keep the pages turning.
What’s on the book horizon for you?
I am just finishing A JANE AUSTEN ENCOUNTER, Book 3 in my Elizabeth and Richard literary suspense series. After that I’ll be back to the Monastery Murders with A MUFFLED TOLLING. This time Felicity is going to Oxford to help some nuns with a publishing project. “Now don’t get into trouble,” Antony warns. If you know Felicity like I do, you know that’s a laugh line.
Last question, how can readers find you and your books?
To read more about all my books and see pictures from my garden and research trips go to: http://www.donnafletchercrow.com/ And I would love to have you follow me on Facebook.
Thank you for sharing your writing life with my bleaders! (blog + readers = bleaders)
Thank you, Suzanne. It’s a pleasure to be here today. I love meeting new readers. If anyone has any questions, leave them in the comments below and I’ll drop by to respond.
Please welcome to my blog Kristi Carter, co-author of the wonderful book Guerrilla Marketing to Baby Boomers. She has some wonderful tips, so be sure to check out her book AND enter to win a copy! To be entered, simply leave a comment on this post with your name and email address. I’ll announce the winner next Friday!
In my book I show how large and small businesses can optimize their marketing effort to the targeted audience of baby boomers. I teamed up with Jay Conrad Levinson, the father and originator of Guerrilla Marketing, on this book. It was a joy and an honor to work with him. Many businesses are realizing that baby boomers are buying for three generations; their children, themselves and their aging parents. The baby boomers are the biggest sector of consumers with disposable income, and they demand high standards in the products they purchase. Baby boomers have a consciousness that past generations were not as concerned about. Boomers have actually helped our society raise the bar for more sustainable items and environmentally sound products. They care about the world around them and what they will be leaving as a legacy to their children. In Guerrilla Marketing to Baby Boomers, I discuss the boomers’ perception of the world. It is crucial for marketers to use the right language and method to activate interest in their prospects’ mind. It is important to know that boomers are changing the world for a better and simpler place.
In my book I show several marketing methods that help simplify our marketing plans ranging from using social media to delegating certain tasks to professional services such as Odesk. Working efficiently is the key here. For the entrepreneur, my book shows how to set up and use autoresponders, viral marketing, and landing pages to drive traffic to their product or services. More and more people are preferring the “work at home online” model of business so they can spend more time at home with their families. This book speaks to them and points the way. Family values and time freedom are the buzzwords that so many entrepreneurs use to propel themselves onto great success both personally and professionally as they work at home online.
In this book you will learn:
* The basic principles of marketing online
* How to get an audience of people begging to buy your product
* Why and what baby boomers are buying
* How to automate your business so you can spend more time with the family
* The importance and influence of social media
* Secrets that baby boomers don’t want you to know
* Developing and sustaining your marketing plan
There are resources throughout each paragraph of the book to educate and help marketers reach their goals. In chapter seven, “Secrets for Selecting the Best Marketing Methods,” there are links to demographic studies, e-media, and info-media. If you have the Kindle version, you can simply click and go to that link immediately. Plus there is a number of case scenarios that shows the cost and time frame for running ads in the Yellow Pages, television ads, and radio ads. This book provides 150 ways to reach your audience through mini and maxi marketing methods. Chapter nineteen disusses using Skymall as a resource to promote your business. The later chapters show how to put all of these methods into action. This book is a hands-on marketing tool that is up-to-date with the current methods of marketing online and offline. Using a few different marketing methods, both online and offline, will your heighten your exposure to the baby boomer customer. I wish you all much success, happiness, and lots of family time.
You can purchase the book, Guerrilla Marketing to Baby Boomers, by clicking here. You can also contact me by emailing kristiacarter@gmail. Or visit me on Facebook here and here.
Tune in on Thursday at 4:00 pm Central! To listen in – go here and just click on the player in the top right corner.
Sherry Gore has agreed to host the show this week in the midst of her busy book launch (TV interviews (including the Today Show), radio interviews and much fun! Be sure to check out all the goings-on over at her blog.) Two guests will be joining Sherry this week. The first half hour will feature Joel Cliff from PADutchCountry.com. He’ll be talking summer in Pennsylvania Amish country – what to do and where to go. Then during the second half hour, Sherry and Brad Igou will take a look at the sensationalism of Amish on TV. Should be fascinating.
Leave a comment {HERE} for a chance to win a copy of Sherry’s new cookbook, Simply Delicious Amish Cooking (or email ckrumm@litfusegroup.com if the comment box isn’t working. Winner will be notified next week via email.
More about Joel Cliff: Joel is the spokesperson for the Pennsylvania Dutch Convention & Visitors Bureau, located in Lancaster County PA. Our organization is the official voice of Lancaster tourism, and our area welcomes about 10 million visitors each year.
Pennsylvania Amish Country is a picturesque landscape that must be witnessed in person to be fully appreciated. Rolling hills with lush grasses and crops, farms with windmills dotting the horizon and horse and buggies sharing the road remind you that things are simpler here in Lancaster County.
Plan your trip and learn more here: http://www.padutchcountry.com.
More about Brad Igou: Brad grew up in Lancaster City. As a sociology-anthropology major at Ithaca College, he lived and worked with an Amish family for three months in Lancaster as part of an independent study. His interest in other cultures took him to the Peace Corps in Costa Rica, where he worked in agricultural extension and taught English for three years. Following a one-year teaching stint in York, he went to Japan, where he taught English and wrote articles on Japan for numerous publications.
Returning to Lancaster in 1987, he secured a position with Amish Country Tours and is now president and a co-owner of the company. During Brad’s tenure, he has overseen the renovation of the Amish Country Homestead, obtained “Heritage Site” status for the Homestead, as well as having written the script for and piecing together the complicated puzzle of the Amish Experience Theater’s critically acclaimed special effects driven production of “Jacob’s Choice”. In addition to the daily tours of the Amish farmlands, Brad has developed popular theme tours for both individuals and groups, especially student groups.
As Editor-in-Chief, Brad is responsible for the editorial content and publishing of Amish Country News, with half a million copies printed annually. In his 25 years in this role, he has written 100’s of articles about Lancaster County for the magazine. His Amish Series has long been one of the most eagerly anticipated in each new issue. He’s been encouraged to publish a compilation of his Amish Country News musings and may yet consider doing so.
In 2005, working with the PA Dutch Convention and Visitors Bureau, he was instrumental in planning and scripting the “Witness Movie Anniversary Tour,” which brought visitors to Lancaster from all over the world to see the farm where this famous Hollywood movie was filmed. More recently, he created the Amish Visit-In-Person Tour, which gives visitors the opportunity to personally meet and talk with the Amish where they live and work. In 2010, the VIP Tour was the first, and to date the only, experience to be designated an official “Heritage Tour” by the County of Lancaster, granting prestigious authenticity status to the experience. The year 2013 marked the debut of the Amish Mafia Tour, designed to separate Amish culture fact from fiction as depicted in the Discovery Channel TV series.
In 1999, his compilation of Amish writings titled THE AMISH IN THEIR OWN WORDS was published by Herald Press, and he is currently working on a “Volume Two.” He is a past Chairman of the Board of the Pennsylvania Dutch Convention & Visitors Bureau. While Brad has spent over 12 years living and traveling abroad, he says that his heart always stayed in Lancaster, which he is now proud to call “home.”
More about Sherry: Sherry Gore is a scribe for the national edition of The Budget newspaper, a cookbook author and editor in-chief of Cooking & Such magazine.
Learn more at Sherry’s website, www.sherrygore.com.
More about Sherry’s new cookbook, Simply Delicious Amish Cooking (Zondervan): Unbeknownst to many folks outside the Amish Mennonite population in America, Pinecraft, Florida—a village tucked away in the heart of Sarasota—is the vacation paradise of the Plain People. Unlike any other Plain community in the world, this village is a virtual melting pot of Amish and Mennonites from around the world, intermingled with people, like author Sherry Gore’s family, who live there year-round. Gore has put together a cookbook that represents the people who make Pinecraft unique. With hundreds of easy-to-prepare recipes, 16 full-color photographs and black-and-white photographs throughout, this cookbook includes traditional favorites such as Sweet Potato Sweet Mash and Mrs. Byler’s Glazed Donuts, as well as Florida favorites including Fried Alligator Nuggets, Grilled Lime Fish Fillets, and Strawberry Mango Smoothies. Interspersed with the recipes are true-life stories about births, engagements, weddings, deaths, funerals, celebrations, wildlife encounters, and accidents told through years of Sherry’s Letters from Home column published in The Budget, the Amish newspaper. This delightful cookbook offers readers a faith-based, family-focused perspective of the simple way of life of the Plain People. It is truly a breath of fresh air from Sarasota, Florida!
Purchase a copy of Simply Delicious Amish Cooking today!
I’m currently in Seattle visiting family, so I thought today would be perfect to introduce you to them (if you haven’t already “met” them from my pictures on Facebook and Twitter).
My sister, Wendy, and me.
This is my oldest daughter, Lindsey.
My son-in-law, Josh, sitting with my grandson, Blake.
This is my daughter Meredith.
My oldest son is Gary, and he’s engaged to Amanda!
This is my youngest son, Tad, and his girlfriend, Sarah.
This is my husband, Steve, with my granddaughter, Kaitlyn.
Here I am with Meredith and my mom.
Welcome to Author Spotlight! Each week will feature a different author. We’ll get the scoop behind their writing life and dish a little. The authors will also be giving away a copy of their latest book. FUN.
The winner from last week’s Author Spotlight with Deeanne Gist is Elizabeth Dent! Please email my assistant Christen with your mailing address. (ckrumm@litfusegroup.com)
This week please welcome Beth Wiseman in the spotlight! To win a copy her book The House that Love Built (Thomas Nelson, 2013) , leave a comment on this post.
What is the smartest writing advice you ever got?
Author Barbara Cameron told me five years ago to take care of myself. To keep my doctor and dentist appointments and to make time for resting. She’d been writing a lot longer than I had, and I was so excited to be published that I had jumped on the train full speed. Years later, I am heeding her advice. It’s so easy to put off everything else but writing. And there’s a price for that. Your health.
What was your biggest break?
I broke in with Amish fiction. My first series—The Daughters of the Promise—sold to Thomas Nelson in late 2007. I’ve been riding the wave ever since. ☺ Although, now I am alternating between Amish novels and non-Amish contemporaries.
I’m inspired by. . .
. . .the people and events around me. And God’s grace, of course.
My great adventure has been. . .
. . .I’m living it. Every day.
The one thing I hope to discover is. . .
. . .how to avoid fear and worry and to feel the true peace that I write about in my books.
If I could go anywhere, it would be. . .
. . .It used to be to cooking school in Italy, but since I’m dieting…I might have to rethink that, lol.
If you have only an hour. . .
. . .I would want to spend it with my family.
Describe yourself in one word
Driven.
If your house were on fire, what one thing would you save?
After my pets, I’d grab my photo albums.
What has been your most surreal, “pinch-me-I’m-dreaming” moment so far?
When my agent sold my first series to Thomas Nelson.
What drives you to succeed?
Fear of failure.
Best Saturday Afternoon Read
My reading preferences are all over the place. Hard to pick just one book, lol. ☺
Best Forgotten Custom
When my children were young, we decorated the Christmas tree together. Now, even if they are home for the holidays, I end up doing it myself. ☹
Best Way to Break a Sweat
Tennis!
Best Style Icon
I live and work in Tshirts and sweats/shorts. I’m not sure I have any style icons, lol.
Best Time-Waster
Playing games on my phone—Wordfeud, Ruzzle, and Hanging with Friends.
Best Indulgence
Mexican food!
Best Advice
Miracles happen to those who believe. BELIEVE.
Welcome to Pearl Girls™ Mother of Pearl Mother’s Day blog series—a nine-day celebration of moms and mothering. Each day will feature a new post by some of today’s best writers (Tricia Goyer, Lisa Takeuchi Cullen, Beth Vogt, Lesli Westfall, and more). I hope you’ll join us each day for another unique perspective on Mother’s Day.
AND . . . do enter the contest for a chance to win a beautiful handcrafted pearl necklace and a JOYN India bag. Enter at the bottom of this post. The contest runs 5/4-5/13, and the winner will be announced on 5/14. Contest is only open to U.S. residents.
If you are unfamiliar with Pearl Girls™, please visit www.pearlgirls.info, subscribe to our blog, and see what we’re all about. In short, we exist to support the work of charities that help women and children in the US and around the globe. Consider purchasing a copy of Mother of Pearl: Luminous Lessons and Iridescent Faith to help support Pearl Girls™.
Mother Ship (N.) – a ship that serves or carries one or more smaller ships.
Raising two boys in India is quite nice, really. We have monkeys, scooters, plenty of dirt, and mountains. The challenges are comical. I found very quickly on that if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. It’s been an excellent motto for our three years thus far, one I learned shortly after our arrival here in June of 2010.
We’d been in India for just three days when I had my first major meltdown. Our two boys, ages three and four, were sitting in big plastic buckets in our smelly bathroom, covered with mosquito bites, jetlagged as can be. I was frantically pouring cold water over them, trying to scrub off the India grime that had caked on their scrawny little bodies. I was having to hold them like puppy dogs so they wouldn’t scurry out from underneath the cold water. It was a far cry from the sweet, warm, bubbly, happy bath time we’d experienced together for the past four years in the States! Talk about culture shock. They were in shock. I was in shock. I’m sure the neighbors were in shock, too. I’m not sure my boys have ever seen me scream, cry, and stomp that much. Thank God it is just a memory now.
Somehow, by God’s grace, we’ve figured out life here. It looks much different than I had ever thought it would look, especially as a mother. We don’t go to the library, make elaborate crafts, play T-ball, shop at Target, sing in church choir, or take family bike rides. I have had to redefine my ideal upbringing for my children and have had to let go of many expectations. But I’ve managed to grasp hold of a new set of dreams.
My children are global kids. They have an incredible adventure every day. They see the “majority world” firsthand. I think they are some of the most privileged kids I know. I’ve stopped feeling sorry for myself that my kids don’t get to go to ballgames or have a huge tree house or wear cute clothes. Why focus on what I think they’ve lost, only to lose sight of what they’re gaining?
My attitude shift didn’t come easily. I can be quite stubborn. I clung to what I knew and what I thought was “normal” and “right,” as all of us moms do. I’d cry after phone conversations with friends back home who had their children signed up for karate, soccer, and swim lessons, with loads of choices for good schools, churches, and neighborhoods. I had nothing of the sort available for my kids, and I felt bitter and resentful.
But then I slowly began to change. Slowly, after months of getting over culture shock and cold baths, we began to love this place and the people we were with. We began to know them, understand them, become like them. Our community here became our family. Just this week, I’ve been sick with an awful kidney infection, and my living room has been full of my Tibetan, Nepali, and Indian friends, bringing me food, rubbing my feet, playing with my children, washing my dishes. I’ve never experienced community in this way before. My boys are loved so well by so many. And they are learning how to love back, even when it’s not easy.
My attitude shift didn’t come quickly, but when it happened, it took a 180°. I realized how wrong I’d been. These people I live with—their kids don’t have organized sports, church choirs, or fancy vacations either. Their kids aren’t signed up for after-school activities and aren’t becoming multi-skilled elementary school prodigies. Yet, in spite of this, they are content. Like none I’ve ever seen. They love each other. Like none I’ve ever seen. They have very little, yet they have so very much.
In the western world of comparisons and endless striving, I believe we sometimes lose touch of the things we actually care most about. I know most of us moms actually don’t care whether our children are the best at T-ball or whether their crafts look better than the next kid’s. But I think we all care deeply that our kids are loved, and that they know how to love. We all have a common dream that our kids will grow up to be world-changers, to strive for what is right, to love the unloved, to see the world in a different way. These are the deepest dreams of moms. So let’s not forget that the most important things we can give our kids are not the things we can buy them or sign them up for. One of the greatest gifts we can give to our children is to give them sails, let them explore new things, meet new people, and learn to make lasting change in this world.
So join me this Mother’s Day. Let’s all be “mother ships,” leading our kids to new adventures, new beginnings, new relationships. Let’s serve and carry our little ones to places they can only dream of, whether it be making dinner for a neighbor, smiling at the homeless man in front of the grocery store, volunteering at a soup kitchen, or moving to India. Let’s take them with us and teach them how to sail.
“A ship in port is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for.” —Grace Murray Hopper
In June 2010, an opportunity arose to work with a small needy community in the Himalayas, so David and Melody Murray and their two young boys packed their bags and moved to Rajpur, North India. Mel has grown JOYN, fulfilling her passion to connect artisans with western markets. They now have a diverse and growing team of Americans, Australians, Indians, Tibetans and Nepalis working together to create a community that strives to take care of each other and bring opportunity to as many as they can. Visit her website for more information.
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Welcome to Pearl Girls™ Mother of Pearl Mother’s Day blog series—a nine-day celebration of moms and mothering. Each day will feature a new post by some of today’s best writers (Tricia Goyer, Lisa Takeuchi Cullen, Beth Vogt, Lesli Westfall, and more). I hope you’ll join us each day for another unique perspective on Mother’s Day.
AND . . . do enter the contest for a chance to win a beautiful handcrafted pearl necklace and a JOYN India bag. Enter at the bottom of this post. The contest runs 5/4-5/13, and the winner will be announced on 5/14. Contest is only open to U.S. residents.
If you are unfamiliar with Pearl Girls™, please visit www.pearlgirls.info, subscribe to our blog, and see what we’re all about. In short, we exist to support the work of charities that help women and children in the US and around the globe. Consider purchasing a copy of Mother of Pearl: Luminous Lessons and Iridescent Faith to help support Pearl Girls™.
The day had come.
My mother lay pressed against her pillow, her skin like baking paper, her limbs disposable chopsticks. She had not moved or spoken for days.
In those last days we rarely left her side, my three siblings and I. Between us we had eleven children, the youngest my newborn, whom we had baptized a week ago right here by my mother’s bedside. The children tumbled and danced around the hospice floor, admonished by us to keep quiet, keep quiet! They had already said their good-byes to Nana. Now it was our turn.
The hospice nurses had told us of the final signs. She will cease to wake, even briefly. Her fingers and toes will turn blue. Her breathing will grow shallow and ragged.
Then we heard it. My mother took a breath. That’s all it was—a sip of air. We knew it was time. We rushed around her, my siblings and I, and all together began to sob.
And this is what I said to my mother before she died: “I’ll be all right, Mommy. Don’t worry. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be all right.”
Not “I love you.” Not “I’ll miss you.” Not “thank you for everything.” Why? I asked myself that night as I cradled my colicky newborn, both of us wailing. Why did I choose that moment to inform my mother of my own well-being? Why did I feel this was the very thing she needed to know as she drew her last breath?
It took me years as a parent to understand: As mothers, that is exactly what we want to know. We want to know our children are safe. We need to know they’ll be all right as they journey into the world without us by their sides.
I don’t know if my mother heard me. But if she did, I hope my final words eased her journey just a hair. That she believed and trusted in my well-being, and then let go.
Lisa Takeuchi Cullen is the author of Pastors’ Wives, a new novel from Penguin/Plume, and The Ordained, a 2013 CBS drama pilot. Previously, she was a staff writer for Time magazine. Readers can friend her on Facebook, follow her on Twitter @lisacullen, or visit her website at www.lisacullen.com.
Welcome to Pearl Girls™ Mother of Pearl Mother’s Day blog series—a nine-day celebration of moms and mothering. Each day will feature a new post by some of today’s best writers (Tricia Goyer, Lisa Cullen, Beth Vogt, Lesli Westfall, and more). I hope you’ll join us each day for another unique perspective on Mother’s Day.
AND . . . do enter the contest for a chance to win a beautiful handcrafted pearl necklace and a JOYN India bag. Enter at the bottom of this post. The contest runs 5/4-5/13, and the winner will be announced on 5/14. Contest is only open to U.S. residents.
If you are unfamiliar with Pearl Girls™, please visit www.pearlgirls.info, subscribe to our blog, and see what we’re all about. In short, we exist to support the work of charities that help women and children in the US and around the globe. Consider purchasing a copy of Mother of Pearl: Luminous Lessons and Iridescent Faith to help support Pearl Girls™.
In my early mommy-ing years, I was all about perfection. I wasn’t going to be just a good mom—oh, no. I grabbed the virtual performance bar and shoved it way out of my reach.
It didn’t take long for that bar to come crashing down on my head. Perfection was toppled by the harsh reality that, at times, I was an angry mom. I hit my knees and begged God for forgiveness, for patience, for the ability to love my children one day at a time . . . sometimes one hour at a time.
I embraced 1 Peter 4:8: Love covers a multitude of mistakes, even altering it a bit so that it met my need. My version of 1 Peter 4:8 became: Love covers a multitude of mommy-mistakes. There was no way I could pretend that I was perfect, but I could do everything possible so that my children knew that I loved them, despite my imperfections.
Fast forward through toddlers and teenagers to being the mother of a twenty-something son, two late-teen daughters, and one (surprise!) elementary-school-age daughter.
During lunch one day with Katie Beth and Amy, my two oldest daughters, Katie Beth looked at me and asked, “Do you want to know what the best thing was about you as a mom?”
Did I? How could I say no to an unexpected “her children will rise up and call her blessed” moment? I assured Katie Beth I absolutely wanted to know the best thing about me as a mom. She looked at me and said, “The best thing about you as a mom was that you weren’t perfect.”
Oh. I admit I expected something . . . more. I joked with my daughter, telling her I wished she’d told me this sooner, as I wasted too much time trying to be perfect. We all laughed and the conversation moved on.
A few weeks later as a prepared a talk on motherhood and perfection for a moms group, I asked Katie Beth, “Can you tell me again why not being perfect was the best thing about me as a mom?”
She emailed me a letter that read: So many kids grow up thinking their parents are up on this pedestal. They think their parents can do no wrong, but then when they fail at something or make a mistake . . . it can tend to devastate those kids. Also, it taught me that being a Christian does not equal perfection. So many people think because they are a Christian they have to be perfect, and I learned from you that, while you are a very loving mother, you are not perfect. It helps me know you don’t expect me to be perfect.
Our children don’t want perfect moms—but they do want to know we love them. And maybe by admitting we’re not perfect, our kids will avoid the perfectionist trap too.
Beth K. Vogt believes God’s best is often behind the doors marked “Never.” After being a nonfiction writer and editor who said she’d never write fiction, Beth has proudly authored two novels, Wish You Were Here and the newly released Catch a Falling Star. Connect with Beth at bethvogt.com.
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Welcome to Pearl Girls™ Mother of Pearl Mother’s Day blog series—a nine-day celebration of moms and mothering. Each day will feature a new post by some of today’s best writers (Tricia Goyer, Lisa Takeuchi Cullen, Beth Vogt, Lesli Westfall, and more). I hope you’ll join us each day for another unique perspective on Mother’s Day.
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Forty years ago a single, young woman was about to give birth. She didn’t know how she could afford a child without her parents’ help. She hadn’t talked to her former boyfriend in months. She had no idea how to reach him, how to tell him she was having his child.
This young woman attended church some, yet her dialogue with God was stilted. How could God let this happen to her? What would her life be like now? A baby girl was born, and upon holding her child this young lady knew things would be okay. Perhaps this baby was a gift, not a burden as she supposed.
This woman raised her daughter the best she could, and while she wanted to give her child more than she had . . . history has a way of repeating itself. When the daughter became a young woman, she found herself in the same situation—living at home, pregnant and scared.
The daughter knew she could raise this child. After all, her mom had done it. But what would her life be like? How could God let this happen to her?
If you haven’t guessed already. I was the daughter born to a single mom and as a teenager became a single mom myself. At age 17, God gave me a son. My boyfriend was out of the picture, and I faced raising a child alone with little education, no money and, maybe according to the world, little hope for my future.
Now if you take this story at face value, I am nothing more than a statistic. According to government research, most daughters of young mothers will be teen mothers themselves. They face lives of hardship, living on welfare for the most part — becoming a burden rather than an asset to society.
Yet, I am not a statistic. Why? Because God doesn’t do them.
As a 17-year-old pregnant teenager I prayed a simple prayer, “God, I have messed up my life big time. If you can do anything with it, please do.” I dedicated my life and my heart to him and things changed. I had hope in my heart and I started walking God’s way. God brought an amazing, Christian man into my life. John was a wonderful husband and a father to my son. When had a daughter and another one on the way, God did something else unexpected. He gave me the desire to write books.
This Mother’s Day, my heart is filled with thanksgiving. I’m thankful for my mother who chose life for me. I’m thankful that when I questioned my future, God gave me hope.
History has a way of repeating itself in families, but even more important that our history of mess-ups is God’s history of setting things right. God has a history of seeing something no one else does . . . like seeing a king in a shepherd boy named David, seeing an apostle in a young zealot named Paul, and seeing a mighty warrior in a frightened nobody named Gideon. God’s X-ray eyes see right through any outward characteristics or national statistics. His X-ray eyes scan down to the heart.
Where have you felt you’ve fallen short of God’s perfect plan? Trust that God’s dream is to turn a mess-up into a miracle. He’s a BIG God with BIG dreams. A God who has made an agreement with us that is eternal, final, and sealed. A God who is strong in our weakness. A God who sees the future, sees the past and has a perfect plan for me . . . and for you. It’s something we can all be thankful for.
Tricia Goyer is a busy mom of six, grandmother of two, and wife to John. Somewhere around the hustle and bustle of family life, she manages to find the time to write fictional tales delighting and entertaining readers and non-fiction titles offering encouragement and hope. Tricia is also on the blogging team at MomLifeToday.com, TheBetter
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Honored and humbled at winning the 2012 Carol Award for Best Long Contemporary Novel (The Search)) and being a finalist in 2011 for a Christy Award (The Waiting) and in 2010 for a Carol Award (The Choice)!
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